Quiet Ivy

Quiet Ivy, a.k.a. The Retreat

(Original text modified from the "Quiet Ivy" entry in the stupendous Daria Encyclopedia 0.0 by CINCGREEN.)

Quiet Ivy is a private psychiatric institution ("spa") near Lawndale, appearing only in "Psycho Therapy." It is also known as "The Retreat" by Helen's law firm, Vitale, Horowitz, Riordan, Schrecter, Schrecter, and Schrecter. (Note: This facility appears to have no connection to the Brookside Rest Home, a psychiatric hospital mentioned in The Daria Database.)

"Renewal and Rejuvenation for the Spirit and the Soul" is the motto appearing on the Quiet Ivy brochure (with additional phrases like: "We exercise your inside instead of your outside"). It is implied that prospective candidates for full partner at Helen's law firm are sent to Quiet Ivy with their families, at the law firm's cost, to be evaluated by the mental-health staff, and in this vein the Morgendorffers visit Quiet Ivy in "Psycho Therapy." Before arriving at the facility, family members must fill out questionnaires with unusual questions like: "Which animal would you rather be: a dog, a seal, or a lion? Now explain your choice in a brief sentence."

Daria of course filled out her forms with unlikely answers, which led the Quiet Ivy staff to believe she was mentally ill and needed "intensive observation." When the doctors conclude that Daria was just being sarcastic, one remarks, "Looks like we got our hopes up." Another doctor asks his colleague if they could at least sedate Daria.

Quiet Ivy has a large dining hall and a computer room with multiple terminals that can each access the Internet. It is unclear if this is an outpatient or Inpatient facility, or if there are accommodations for overnight stays by outpatients. Each family member has a personal counselor; Daria's counselor is Dr. Jean-Michel Millepieds, who concludes Daria is well adjusted, but her family is not.

The results of the Morgendorffers' evaluations are sent to the law firm where Helen works. As it turns out, the firm was looking for workaholics, and Helen was a perfect match.

Staff and Patients

Known Staff

• Dr. Millepieds, Daria's one-on-one counselor
• Dr. Bacon, Helen's one-on-one counselor, who also oversees joint sessions between family members
• Dr. Hinkle, Jake's one-on-one counselor
• Priscilla, Quinn's one-on-one counselor (though she prefers Dr. Millepieds)

Known Patients

• The Morgendorffer family
• Mrs. Johannsen

Quiet Ivy in Fanfic

Quiet Ivy is mentioned in passing in a number of fanfics, almost always with a certain amount of fallout resulting from the too-free exchange of opinions by Helen and Jake (e.g., Crusading Saint's "Fixing a Hole," or The Angst Guy's "Aunt Kara"). Few fanfics have actual scenes set at Quiet Ivy; among those are the following.

• "Daria's Addition" by The Angst Guy (see chapters III and IV)
• "Outcasts from Beyond" by The Angst Guy (see chapter XXX)
• "The Two of Them" by The Angst Guy (see chapter VI)
• "Pieces of the Rainbow" by shinai, which cleverly refers to the place as "The Retreat at Quiet Ivy"
• "Tiptoe Through the Ivy" by Richard Lobinske has the family, along with John Lane attend the retreat, with intersting results when Helen and Jake role play as Daria and John.

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